| March 21st, 2006

* dealing with my toddler

These days I found a new way to discipline my toddler girl.

When she doesn’t want to do something and I feel she should, I come up with two options and ask her to pick one.

For example when she doesn’t want to share her toys with a guest baby, I give her two options: “which one you like to give her, this toy or that toy?”. She picks one.

Sometimes she doesn’t want to clean her face, I ask her if she wants to wash her face or take a bath. Obviously she prefers the face wash.

If I force her she gets upset whereas this way she thinks she is the one who made the choice so everyone is happy:). When she becomes more intelligent, she will say, “none”, then I will have to come up with a new strategy.

Another technique I use is to offer her some reward. For example, She likes to wach Barney after her dinner. So I say, If you can finish your veges/food we can watch Barney. I do this with one caution though, I give her as much as she usually takes (so that it is feasible for her to finish the food). Also I notice if she has cold or anything, in that case no reward will bring her appetite back.


No Responses to “* dealing with my toddler”

  1. rumi says:

    It won’t be too long before she starts saying no to both the options

  2. Ishret says:

    This is indeed an effective, proven way of dealing a child, at least it worked for me!! I started applying this to my daughter since her toddler age and she is in first grade now and it still works. She is an intelligent and smart kid but she knows her limits and she is well aware of her mother’s consistency (not subborn, they are two different things). She knows “none” is not an option. Sometimes she will find the third option and I may agree with that to give her sense of accomplishment.

    You will be amazed how they develop negotiation skills!! If I say she needs to eat 5 pieces of carrots, she may say, “Can I eat two?” Most of the time I stick to 5 (sometimes go higher as she moves down) but at times we negotiate in the middle. Once in a while, depending on what it is, I let her win as well. She needs to learn effective negotiating but at the same time needs to understand when not to try negotiating. Also, kids need some pride of accomplishment as well. Not sure how long will these methods work though! I may need to start thinking of other ways as she grows up.

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